I grew up in a UCC church in Sandusky, Ohio. My father (and I by extension) were heavily involved in the church, and I was brought up through Sunday School, Confirmation Class and church camp to believe in the institution.

I was supposed to married in my parents' church, and the service was to be performed by the minister who had been there three to four years. Those plans were cut short when my parents called to tell me that he'd just been arrested for child molestation -- over a period of months, he had been molesting a youth from his congregation he was supposed to be counseling. He was later convicted and went to jail for it.

That's bad enough -- but he had been caught in the same kind of act at a prior UCC church, and the UCC had placed him in my parents' church, telling just one or two members of the congregation.

What's more, several years later, I was asked to speak to a group from a UCC church. The pastor emeritus felt the need to contribute to the discussion, and (to the embarrassment of others in the group) he bragged about the community's politically powerful and wealthy who had attended his church. What happened to his Christian humility along the way?

With events like these, I've not been able to place my faith back in the UCC, which is a shame. For years I've been looking for a church with the UCC's type of open-arms philosophy, because my own daughter needs religious education. But how can I put my faith in an institution whose leaders have shown such questionable judgement? I don't think simple forgiveness can work for me -- not when you consider how vulnerable people are when they put their faith in their spiritual leaders.

I would welcome a discussion on how to resolve this conflict. Can anyone help?

Dear Friend,

like those who question faith and seek to live out that faith in a way that is reflective of Jesus' teachings, the UCC is also constantly evolving.  Years ago, it was the unwritten and unspoken practice of 'all' churches to pass on the bad seeds to another community.  As long as "I don't have to deal with it anymore, it isn't my problem."  but we have come to find out, that passing the buck only makes the buck happy and not those who have to live with the buck. 

over the years, the ucc among all denominations (I hope), has learned from our mistakes and began to develop and now fully impliments the "Fitness for Ministry Review" which in the instance of sexual misconduct (on any level), financial misconduct (on any level) and an assortment of other offenses that do not befit a pastor ministering on and in behalf of the United Church of Christ are handled in a confidential and systematic manner to determine whether a pastor who has 'misconducted' should be removed from being able to be a pastor of a united church of christ church.

a long sentence, but one filled with much information!!!  sexual misconduct, unfortunately, is the church's dirty little secret.  wherever there are vulnerable people (re: children!) and pastors who need to feel that they have power over another, or the need to satisfy another human need not being met otherwise, there will be sexual misconduct. 

for us pastors, the best thing are support groups among our peers, pastoral counselors who are trained to help us deal with our big stuff, so we can deal with your big stuff, and spiritual directors so we can help develop our understanding of where God is in our life.  all this is our safety net to help us keep you safe. 

as a teen, i heard that one of my friend's pastor father, had misconducted with a teen in his congregation.  i heard he was removed... but i lost touch with my friend.  I pray for the families of the misconducted pastors... i pray for their victims..,. and i pray for them that they will find the peace they have been looking for.

please, don't judge all pastors or all ucc churches based on one or two.  we are all human and churches are made up of very falible humans.  God helping us, we try to accept each other - wherever we are on life's journey and welcome all here too.  papastor